...goes the weasel

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

The Eighth One (aka The One With The Rant)

(note: this was done on notepad, and then cut and pasted.)

when was the last time you went to a hawker centre?

an actual hawker centre. one that can only be termed 'organised chaos'. as you walk down the aisles, the flames almost spill out from under the wok, threatening to set fire to anybody who attempts to walk past it. as you walk around the radius defined by that firen from the hounds of hell, a shout of 'SIAM AH!' rings through the air, causing one to almost jump. as you turn around to wonder at the source of the noise, the layer of grime on top of the tiled floor almost cause you to slip and fall.

now that, boys and girls, is what i would call an actual hawker centre.

the old market near my house that had been simply left alone for quite a few years just reopened. it was one of those really old markets. as in wet market old. the kind of place where you would be standing at the vegetable stall, deciding on the freshest and ripest tomatoes and all you would smell, is that stench from the drain. while pointing out your choice chicken hanging from the hook and you would smell the drain. and finally, just before leaving that market, you decide to stop by the fish stall. taking a whiff, all that lingers in the air, is the smell of.. you guessed it, the stench from the drain. indeed.

so i turned up at the newly refurbished place, hoping for the best. took a walk around, and i noticed a sign hanging around at every single stall i saw. either that was the flash of blue pieces of acrylic, or it was simply adorned on every stall.

'BANQUET', it proclaimed proudly.

oh boy, did i step into a trap.

it was horrible. i've always avoided like the plague any place where people consume food with the words 'KOPITIAM', 'FORK AND SPOON' and 'BANQUET'. havent exactly tried food rep yet, so cant complain yet. i avoid them not that the food is bad, although the food there is really mediocre at best. its just simply too clean, too orderly and too organised. the stalls are decked out neatly in a row, all stallholders wearing that neatly pressed uniform, just waiting for you to please, please, please buy your food from them. now i understand that has all to do with the increase in the standard of living, but maybe they did too good a job this time, because somehow, a clean and orderly place with people lined up in neatly pressed white uniforms just looks so strangely familiar.

and the was exactly like i expected. food was not the best around, prices were steeper than everest, and it didnt smell like one. it was quite amazing. a hawker centre (it had no air con, so doesnt qualify as a foodcourt) that did not smell at all of cooking oil. everybody knows that smell takes up about 60% of taste, so imagine my dispair when everything just looked so uniform, so clean and rubber stamped. sigh.

its things that these that take the soul out of 'soul food'. progress for the sake of progress should
never be encouraged. hawker centres are part of our culture, much like that kiasuism that so many of us are tempted to proclaim as our religion. do we really want all the food courts around to have that same same but different chicken rice stall, noodle and of course, the customary muslim food stall, all dishing out the same drab fare, shamelessly allowing our tastebuds and minds to accept such mediocrity on a regular basis, available at any of those franchised, brand-name food courts.

so, tell me, when was the last time you went to a hawker centre, and the soup accompanying the bak chor mee you ordered was absoulutely crowded with unidentifiable brown bits, much like that yellow cloud from the miso soup,but just tasted so damn good.

by wc at 7:48 PM |